emang susah yah merubah paradigma... bahkan untuk merubah paradigma diri sendiri... i guess.. banyak hal yang vi rasa diamini karena asumsi2 yang bikin sendiri yang ofcourse not even right btw...
for once, i lost my money on the atm on monday... when i called up the customer service... she seems to reluctant to belive what happens to me, because actually the bank's computer data base showed that i did the second withdrawal of a hundred and my saldo was being deducted by two hundred... i got my one hundred and lost the other one... she said they processed within one to three days... today is the second day... and i havent have my money back... i hardly force my self to have a positive thinking that my money will come back eventually... because... hiks! lumayan lho seratus rebu juga... hiks!
that's only one example... and there are lots of other things going on my life which need lots of positive thinkings...
i dont wanna live in a dream... but i dont want to have a bad reality neither just because i wondered things based on asumptions... things i dont know is not a reality... and dont make it bad - just because i feel and think bad about it...
pernah tau2 chat sama temen yang dulu kenalan di salah satu milis... dulu vi ma dia email2an... dan curhat2an... dan... ternyata kita tidak cocok... karena kita tidak sepaham... yang mungkin "tidak sepaham" karena asumsi2 yang vi bangun tentang dia... secara kita emang gak pernah ketemu anyway...
komunikasi just ended karena vi merasa sedikit tersinggung... yeah! something like that laaahhh...
dan tau gak apa komentarnya tentang vi? setelah sekian lama?
"*** bla, bla, bla...
ternyata masalahnya dari dulu sama aja..."
yes! i feel about that lately...
beberapa hal tidak berubah tentang diri vi sejak maybe 2 years ago...
walopun vi merasa sudah cukup dewasa dibeberapa hal... jadi makin manja disisi lain... jadi gendut klo diliat dari timbangan badan :D
oke... di kantor vi pindah bagian dan ngerjain beberapa hal baru yang berbeda...
tapi... tidak banyak hal yang terjadi dengan vi...
orang lain menikah dan punya anak... orang lain putus pacaran dan punya pacar baru... vi? what am i doing? am i just letting time goes by without even noticing what's going on in my life? am i living on other reality which i dont even understand why?
memang sih waktu terasa sangat2 cepat berlalu... hari ini sudah hari rabu, besok hari kamis dan besoknya lagi hari jumat, trus tau2 hari sabtu lagi...
dan begitu seterusnya... jadi?
what should i do anyway?
should i take a drawing lesson so i could picture another great reality on my life?
haha...
No comments:
Post a Comment